Afternoon all.

The excitement of the transfer window is cranking up, well sort of.

Alou Diarra’s the first concrete name we’ve been linked to since it opened, a Liverpool reject who has ping-ponged around French league football since returning to his homeland, and is now at Lens. He’s 24, and the only other snippet of information I can find on the official RC Lens site is the tantalising news that he was born in a place called Villepinte. Crucial info, I’m sure you agree.

Anyway, we’re told he’s apparently quite good now, and being French, barges to the front of the transfer queue at our club. It’s a rumour the Guardian thinks contains “the faint whiff of desperation”, but it has all the classic Wenger hallmarks.

Any chance of an Englishman, Arsène?

The only reason I say that is there’s one available, apparently, and he goes by the name of Raymond Parlour. (If you can’t look forwards too far, there’s always backwards I find).

Then there’s the news that Peter Hill-Wood is concerned that Henry might leave. It’s a different take on the same old story and it’s excruciatingly dull.

Must dash, so that’s your lot for today’s East Lower LITE.